This is a repost that I wrote last Valentines Day.  Things have changed since that day.  Emma has her own horse now, Maggie, started her freshman year at ODU and was diagnosed as BiPolar.  She's still as beautiful and wonderful as ever. I'm biased but then I'd also like her to move out of my house.

Bubbly Boy died from a virus that went to his heart.  We all have spent the last 5 months in overwhelming grief.  His death made this post more relevant than I could ever have thought possible.  Questions, feelings, and thoughts that I may write about later.  So I hope you enjoy it the second time around.  

Happy  Valentines Day to everyone, everyone in our lives, everyone who has had an effect on our lives and everyone that needs a voice wishing them the happiest Valentines Day ever.

I would normally post my thoughts about this subject/song in Our Passions but lately my heart seems overwhelmed by the suffering in our world.  Maybe it's the lack of ability our politicians possess to show any compassion or kindness to anyone but themselves.  Maybe it's because I fail to see so many do the right thing when presented with the opportunity.  Maybe because it's Valentines Day and I know of people close to me hurting.  Hurting because people close to them chose to manipulate, lie and act as if they didn't have a responsibility for taking care of the gifts they had been given with no reservations.

Sometimes, though, beauty overtakes the suffering and comes flowing through my senses.  It's simply spending time with Argo and Emma, watching their interaction, the joy they both show to be free to run or play.  Horses play and it's a glorious event to watch.  Sometimes it's the smell of Argo and the feel of her strength as I wrap my arms around her neck and rest my head on her side, knowing she'll patiently stand and allow me to release the sorrow and tension I feel.

It could be the simple joy of feeling bubbly boy and pretty princess squeal when they see us, offering freely their hugs and kisses.  The way they hold our hands in complete trust that we would never allow them to be hurt or scarred.

All that I witness or feel, kind or disrespectful, gracious or demeaning, beautiful or ugly, fill my heart with a heaviness I have not been able to discard.  There are so many, too many, that simply need a kind word, a hug, a helping hand, a gift of time with no return or price to pay.

I live in a country with so much to give and all I see is those that have, wanting more, more, more.

I've tried, in every way possible to teach my daughters, by example, with books, with history, even movies, to raise them to be women that will give their lives and their strength to others, so that those lives they touch may be strong.  They might have life.

They will change the world

To this end, we, Emma, Bonnie and I have watched The Mission with Robert DeNiro, many times.  We cry every time.  Our hearts break every time.  Yet, every time we come away stronger, our ability to give emboldened and our hearts reminded that our way of  life, the American way of  life is unique and unknown to most of the world.

It's not about cars, or large houses.  It's not about toys or even clothes.  It's about safety, freedom to choose how you live and die.  It's about becoming the person you were gifted to be because you don't have to worry about your next meal, your child dying, your village being plundered and pillaged for no reason than your faith or the color of your skin.  Can you imagine hopelessly accepting a fate that might bring death because of the water you drink? every day? insects that bring disease that my daughters have no knowledge of because, here in this country, those diseases have simply been eradicated.  Easy and simple.

I encourage you to watch The Mission, a story of possessiveness and wealth, disregard and disrespect for those different from us, about death and life and ultimately about redemption.

Gabriel's Oboe, which I'm sure most people will recognize was written for the movie by Ennio Morricone.  Hayley Westenra took the score and wrote lyrics to accompany Gabriel's Oboe.  I own an edition of the song sung by Hayley Westenra.  I listen to it often.