My second piece of advice. Yes, I’m keeping up with my existential year of advice for my daughters and any woman younger than I who really needs the truth. Trust me, after half a century of living, most of what I've experienced has had truth riding on my heels. You should never stop seeking the truth. It may hurt. It may feel as if it will destroy you but it won't. It will shine a light on your imperfections and you will be better for it.
Here it is, in all it’s glory, offensive or not. Sex toys are wonders of the modern age.
True story: My daughter Emma and I were taking a weekend to ourselves and staying in a nice motel enjoying each other’s company and using the opportunity to share our hearts, dreams, and disappointments. That night we decided to watch the movie Hysteria. We laughed until tears ruined our nightshirts.
I highly recommend the movie by the way, obviously.
At the end of the movie, the director decided to run a history of vibrators. Discussion between Emma and I followed. I have never been embarrassed to discuss any topic with my girls. I certainly never wanted them to be embarrassed or ashamed of their sexuality. I wanted them to embrace it. Embrace being a woman and all that has to offer. Know what you want from sex and how to ask for it. Feel free to express yourself. It is an “activity” that is not just for procreation, or even an expression of love and commitment between two people. It can actually be fun, rambunctious, and should bring a woman as much bodily and mental satisfaction as Ben and Jerry’s Cherry Garcia does or chocolate for that matter. Hard to believe I know.
Emma, out of the blue, asked me if I had ever visited a website called Adam and Eve, which contains an overwhelmingly comprehensive selection of adult products, including lingerie and sex toys (shock, gasp, horror!).
Yes, my 18 year old actually knew of a site that I didn't. I tend to stick with Amazon. Big mistake!!
I’ll admit I own a few vibrators and I’m guessing most women do though they may not admit. Here’s the surprise, vibrators and sex toys not only bring singular pleasure to a woman on an individual basis but can add to the enjoyment for a couple, quite a bit actually.
Honestly I felt like I was 6 wandering around a Toys R Us for the first time. It was heart palpitating. I kept pointing, “Ooh, I want to try that. No I want to try that. Oh wow, that’s a new one. Amazing. Beerhound would love this one:”
I think Emma was ready to end the conversation at that point. No one wants to know their parents actually have sex, not even me.
*Ooh, I think I just felt a little vomit come up through my throat. There’s a story behind the “parent” thing but that’s for a later day and another piece of advice I can give learned through awful experience.
The moral of the story? My piece of advice? Embrace your sexuality, now! Don’t wait until you’re my age. Don’t be afraid to experiment. Sex can be a smorgasbord. You don’t know what you’ll like until you try it. Give “toys” a chance. They can add a dimension to your enjoyment that you didn't think possible.
And practice, really! Nothing is perfect the first time. Everything takes practice to bring perfection.
I will also add that I love AdamEve.com because the nice folks ship their products in plain, unmarked envelopes and boxes to “preserve the privacy” of anyone squeamish. I’m not but that would certainly include someone with children who are too nosy for their own good, postal workers that hate your dogs or the neighbor who was mistakenly given your package and needed to deliver it to you the next afternoon, in person, with that goofy smile of his.
Good luck young women. Listen to your elders. Go enjoy yourselves. Life is too short to be shy.
Today’s post brought to you in part by Adam and Eve.